Instruction in Self Defense and Martial Arts is best done with a qualified instructor present. I'd be happy to teach a seminar on self-defense as I do several times a year, but I'm not going to do it over the internet!
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It depends on the specific martial art. Most of the arts will teach something along the lines of defense against weapons.
They teach us that cartoons don't explain the world around us
Kung Fu, also called Wushu, is a compilation of fighting techniques that have been developed in china for at least 4000 years.
A lot of things, such as, were they biped or not, were their bones broken, etc.
There is no law to prevent it, but it will depend on the school and the instructor. Some will not teach those that are criminals as they are not considered morally responsible to trust with the techniques of a martial art.