In my opinion, 12 year old shouldn't pitch the ball fast. Hard but not fast! In other words, don't hold back but don't strain either. You have plenty of time to develop speed once your body is developed. Concentrate on good fielding and ball contact when batting and your set for huge future in fpsoftball. A glove is 10 times better than a bat or a pitch.
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it all depends on how long the person has been pitching for. if you have been pitching since a young age it should be mid to high 40's at the least , if you throw faster than that great (: