The only way is to go to a local Pro Shop. Usually you can find this in your local Bowling alley, but if you have choices as to which alley to go to, your best bet would be to ask friends or anybody you know that bowls competitively and they may be able to recommend you to a good proshop owner.
They will specifically measure the span from your thumb to your middle and ring finger, and the diameter of each finger. If you get someone good they can also measure your hand (or watch the way you already bowl) to determine the correct pitch to use for your thumb.
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You can tell if the Bowling ball is right for you by first checking the weight. each person has a different weight they can handle without injuring themselves so first find a bowling ball that is light enough for you to carry and throw down the lane, and does not strain the arm. Also checking the hole on the ball to see if its easy to slide off your fingers. having to small of a hole can cause the ball to stick as your fingers gets bigger as your body heats up. so it is wise to find a ball that you can grip and can slide off easily, weight will also help so you can play longer without getting tired
Make sure it is light but is big enough to knock down all the pins. Secondly, make sure that no one else's fingers are already stuck in the ball. Thirdly, make sure that your main three fingers can fit into the finger rings in the ball. If not the ball is too big or too small. Keep repeating these steps until you find a correct, appropriate ball.
All bowling balls are manufactered the same size. If it is weight you are referring to, it should be the heaviest, most comfortable ball you can hold without straining.